A full day at school, dinner with friends, and finally a drive back to the hotel. It’s late and I walk in to the room and the first thing I grab for is my stitching cloth. It would be so easy to give myself permission to skip my practice tonight, after all it’s only one day and I’ve done so well for the past thirty-four days; will one day matter?
My immediate response is no, one day won’t matter,but the bigger question is, ” I don’t know if one day will matter”. Does one day lead to two, than five, then fourteen? Is permission the wrong word to use when it comes to conscious choice? Am I really in a position to give myself permission to skip a practice period as if I had no choice in taking the vow in the first place?
It’s a difficult discussion, but tonight the decision was easy; walk in to the room, pick up the cloth and begin the stitching process. It feels like it fills in the gaps in the day. There is a resolution aspect to engaging in the process even when I do it in the morning. It takes the edge off the day either in a protective way or a healing way. I don’t know about you but anything that takes the edge off the day I’m a fan.
The word commitment still looms big over my head and it’s not like I’m engaged in a contest, but I am engaged in honoring my word…for today. The truth is I don’t know what I’ll decide tomorrow, but I’ll let you know when I get there!
Blessings to you…